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What to do when someone hurts you?

The agave plant is beautiful. It grows in hot, dry climates mostly in the southwest.  Close to home, we might be acquainted with it as a sweetener.  The agave has many other beneficial uses, but it is also poisonous and can lead to problems if it punctures the skin.  Aren't we the same?  We possess both the bitter and the sweet. The poison that can pierce a heart and the ability to speak sweetly and convey love. Beautiful and ugly, good and bad. Each quality resides in all of of us.    What do we do when we've been hurt by someone we love?  Strike back with our own woundedness? Run? Retreat? Shut down? That's what I tend to do. I nurse my wound and feel sorry and angry at the same time. It's not a healthy place to be. In my head, I believe I have to figure it out on my own. And in that place, I usually remain stuck. Only until my heart starts to listen to the nudges of the Holy Spirit, do I stand a chance to make progress.  And so I have to run.  Not away from my

God shows up in the most unlikely places

It is a mystery.   My husband held his hand out and in it was a lovely sea shell.   He heard it land on the driveway from out of nowhere.   We both wondered where it came from. Maybe a bird found it and dropped it in flight.   Or maybe the shell was caught up by the wind and happened to find its resting place near where Joe was working.   It was the last thing he expected to see.   The shell appeared delicate in structure, and it would seem the fall alone could have chipped it, but it didn’t.   Researchers have learned that sea shells are formed with a strong and resilient design structure.   This design endures the stress of their environment and allows fractures to appear where they would do the least harm to the organism inside.   It’s all about protection.   Isn’t that amazing?   What a great picture of how God uses His strength and resilience in our circumstances.   How He takes on the stresses so we don’t “break”.   God has shown up this way in my life many, many ti
The beginning of Petals of Friendship So what is  Petals of Friendship ?   In 1997, I was still what I would consider a fairly new believer.  I had a thirst for God and wanted the important people in my life to know HIM, too. My desire to know God on a deeper level led me to read and learn.  I also had a great community of women around me who helped me grow in my new found faith.  Thinking back, we were all in different places in our journeys, but one thing rang true.  We loved the Lord and shared that love in our own unique ways.  For me, it came through the creative process of writing.  And so,  Petals of Friendship  was what came from that.  I came across my original newsletter in some old papers I've kept and was surprised to see the date of my first newsletter.  The very first newsletter (top photo) was printed sometime around 1996, on a pin-feed printer.  I vaguely remember that first "edition".  I chuckled as I saw that  I added a crude hand drawn flower on it to

When someone you've never met impacts your life

Dolores was someone who impacted my heart and yet, I never met her.  I learned about her at her memorial service, where her family gathered and shared loving memories and anecdotes about who she was and how she impacted their lives.  Her children and grandchildren conveyed who she was through stories filled with humor, tears and  tenderness.  Her unique and authentic qualities were a common thread throughout the evening.  Each shared memory drew a clear picture of who Dolores was, and as the stories unfolded I began to get a sense of her spirit and personality. Dolores not only sought joy, but she gave it away, freely.  It was a big part of who she was, and it was a significant trait she shared with her family and friends in abundance.  Her life was built upon it, and she communicated this to her family by telling them they each had a choice in life.  That each day, they had the ability to choose joy .  To her, it would be one of the most important daily choices anyone could m

Living within the lines

A bold white line on the right side of my lane and a bright yellow line on the other side.  Orange cones warning me about fresh paint.  I was driving down a freshly striped road. Great.  Now I have to really focus and make sure I don’t veer out of my lane.  I felt a little nervous. If I veered just a little bit, well…I’d be creating a disaster. If you have ever driven over fresh road striping paint, or seen a car that has, you know it really ruins a car’s paint job.   Please let me stay within the lines .  That was my prayer.  Isn’t that how we sometimes try to live our lives?  Staying within the lines so we can have proof that we are doing it right?  I go outside the lines so many times.  It is easy to do and I don’t even recognize it at times because I just go about my merry way.  Yet, I veer off in seemingly simple ways.  By comparing myself to others, by putting myself down, through my attitude toward others, my words, my actions…shall I go on?    I thought about Peter

Rescue me

I was never a good swimmer.  But when I was invited to a friend’s pool party, I begged my mom to go.  The pool looked mammoth to me and all I needed to know was which side was the shallow side.  The safe side. So that’s where I parked myself.  But after a while, I noticed I was the only one at that end of the pool.  The other girls were experienced swimmers and were bouncing around in the deep end. Longing to fit in as much as possible, I was determined to somehow get to the other side. I carefully navigated my way across  by tip toeing on a narrow ledge along the perimeter of the pool.  I used it to make the journey over to the deep end, and I felt pretty satisfied for making it there successfully.  Then my foot slipped.  I felt my body slowly drift just far enough from the edge of the pool where the security of the ledge disappeared.  Suddenly, I had nothing to hold on to that would keep me safely attached to the edge of the pool.  I tried hard to keep my head above the water, but

A Living Prayer

To be seen by God “Do I believe in God?  Yes!  When I am at work I feel like I am assisted by someone who leads me to do things that are greater than myself, greater than what I have done before.”  Henri Matisse Close to the end of his artistic career, Matisse embarked on creating “The Chapelle du Rosaire de Vence” (Chapel of the Rosary), a chapel in France.  He considered it the most significant work of his career, and perhaps one could say that something outside himself caused him to create this masterpiece.  As I read his thoughts, I am certain there was something more to why he created art of any kind. On the outside, his long-standing friendship with Monique Bourgeois, who he met as a young nurse, engaged and motivated him to take on this work.  Their friendship developed over time and lasted for years.  They remained friends as she became a Dominican nun, and his work took on life and breath when he began designing the chapel.  But was it more than this friendship that moved h